Prankster unmasked: Woman delivers bipartisan jabs
By Jim Walsh, Courier Post 05/10/04

The mainstream media would have you believe Donald Rumsfeld spent Friday before two congressional committees, trying to explain the latest thing to go horribly wrong in Iraq.

But I swear I saw the secretary of defense in an open convertible parked off the White Horse Pike in Audubon. The guy had that trademark steely-eyed grin, even as he sat behind a sign that said, "Sorry."

Then again, my Rummy was a dummy-- the creation of Betty McGarrigan, an Audubon women who's been staging comic scenes with political props since 1998.

I'm the wacky dummy lady, says McGarrigan, 53, who has masks for about 20 faux officials-- and who's waiting for John Kerry's mask to be delivered to her door.

Now, as comics go, McGarrigan's a moderate, aiming gentle gibes Democrats and Republicans alike.

My own brand of political humor would have bit more edge.

Like I'd note this awful mess in Iraq is indeed the fault of a handful of people who don't reflect America's best values. Of course, I'm referring to Bush, Cheney and Rumsfeld.

And I'd mock those right wing radio host, but then we're talking clowns, not dummies.

McGarrigan would never be so nasty--and that explains the smiles and waves when she goes cruising with bipartisan characters in her VW Beetle, a bright yellow car decorated with touches of red, white and blue.

"I don't go either way. I just like to make fun of politicians." says McGarrigan, who has her mask dealer's phone number on speed dial.

Her pastime began when McGarrigan converted a 1970 VW Beetle convertible into a float-- a sleigh, actually-- for Audubon's 1998 holiday parade, where it promoted the town-watch organization.

She then put the sleigh outside her family's business, Universal Electronic Supply in Audubon, as a seasonal display. And just to be funny, she added dummies representing two people in the news-- Bill "I did not have sex with that women" Clinton and Monica "He said what?" Lewinsky.

Her most elaborate exhibit came during the controversial recount of Florida ballots in the 2000 presidential race.

"That election was really good," says McGarrigan, who rented a Ryder truck, the same kind being used to move ballots in Florida, to display outside the family firm. She put Clinton behind the driver's wheel, Al Gore in the passenger seat-- and Bush in front of the truck, trying to stop it.

"The people at Ryder said, 'Do you need a hand truck?" recalls McGarrigan. My husband told them , 'Don't even ask.'"

McGarrigan and her husband, Phil, regularly take her show on the road, bringing masks and inflatable dummies along on her vacation trips. Those excursions might help political analysts tab into the public's concerns.

"I wore the George Bush mask in Philadelphia and people were shouting, ' Where are the jobs?'" Phil McGarrigan says.

But everybody loves Bill Clinton. For him, They say, "Where's Monica?"